Honest Indian wedding invitations

Calling all food gluttons, interfering aunties, wannabe models, fashionistas, gossip mongers, Rishta-seekers, selfie-freaks, break dancers and of course the VIP’s…

Here is your FREE Invite to indulge and entertain and comment, gossip, abuse, criticize whoever is within earshot.

You may graciously choose to attend any or all the ceremonies, and not miss the chance to criticise the bride’s family with nonsensical arguments whenever you please.

The M”ahem”di Ceremony,

Mehndi Hai Rachnewaali, Ab Haathon Mein Gehri Laali
Kahe fake Sakhiyaan, Ab Kaliyaan Zindagi Mein Khilnewaali Hain
Tere Mann Ko, Jeevan Ko Nayi Musibatein Milnewaali Hain
O Bechaari Banno…

To,

All the ladies, aunties, close friends, friends of friends, males dressed up as girls etc

Banno and her Dulha fearfully invite you to their “Mayhem”di ceremony

To apply Mehendi for free and dance in circles on very old-fashioned songs

And to double verify our love for each other with your comments on the shade of Mehendi after it falls off.

On Wednesday, 12 th August, 2018

Dinner and Dance will always follow each other, it is your choice anyway.

Location: Our Newly Furnished Home, to show off how much we have been forced to spend to show off.

The “Sung”-“eat” Ceremony

Calling all,

Break Dancers, Over excited baaratis, Crowd pullers, Selfie-taking dancers, Bollywood obsessed performers and disco dancers…

Come and let your hair down, party and practice your bathroom singing for FREE.

Banno and her Dulha a little more fearfully invite you to their “sung”-“eat” ceremony

To break into a dance whenever and wherever you want. Practice and perform your choreography at your own risk. Anyway, you will be commented on later via Facebook.

Kindly do not Embarrass the DJ playing music with your continuous requests.

A last sincere request- Do not pass lame jokes on the bride’s family and pull her leg about her relationship with her future in-laws.

Your conformance to our requests would be given 2K likes.

On Thursday, 13 th August 2018

Dinner and Dance will follow each other as if you really wait for your turn at the table.

Location: Our Newly Furnished Home, to show off how much we have been forced to spend to show off and also allow you to have a peek at all the expensive gifts and jewelry being given by “Which relative, the in-laws and of course the bride’s parents”.

Our “Wed”-“din” Ceremony,

Meri banno ki aayegi baraat ke dhol bajaao ji
meri laaddo ki hogi aj yahan last raat ke dhol bajaao ji
aaj nachungi main saari saari raat ke dhol bajaao ji
hum sabko aur wait karaegi ye baraat ke dhol bajaao ji

Meri laaddo ki kab aayegi baraat ke dhol bajaao ji
sajna ke ghar tu jaayegi yahan hamein rulayegi
sajna ke ghar tu jaayegi aur unki seva karegi
jaake piya ke ghar mein adjust hojana
aur sare sasural walon ko bardasht karlena

To,

All the  invited and uninvited guests concerned, from the same “status” level

Banno and her Dulha invite you to their ‘so-called-royal’ Wed-ding ceremony

To be with us, boost our morale with free advice, unnecessary comments on rituals and of course inquire about the DOWRY openly.

Shower us with your hypothetical and unrealistic suggestions, selfie requests and marriage advice along with some rose petals..

As we exchange our wedding woes, sorry Oaths and promise to bear with each other(and our families’) for eternity.

You can freely indulge in the starters, eight-course meals (separately for veg and non-veg), the mini food court and bring all your kids and relatives’ kids to let them enjoy the mini amusement centre we have set up for them.(because anyway, they will be running around spilling stuff if we let them roam around freely).

Also,

You are expected to bring expensive and branded gifts/cash/higher-scale shagun with NO heavy packaging as we will be trashing it anyway. So, why waste time and create more clutter in our home.

Bee our Guests. But kindly do not bug us if possible.

On Saturday, 15 th August 2018

At Show Off Royal Palace

The Elite City, Delhi.

No need of RSVP, we believe. As we are expecting a lot of gate-crashing till the last minute and have planned accordingly.

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Adeeba Riaz

About the Author

Adeeba Riaz

Hi, I am Adeeba.I’m a freelance writer and a full time mom who likes writing intriguing stories and poems. I love leading my readers on an escape from everyday life. Nature is my inspiration and I firmly believe that self confidence is a key to success. My educational background includes an MTech in Computer Science and Engineering. I have a B.E. in Computer Science from M.J. College in Hyderabad, India. I have a research article on machine learning to my credit on IJEIR journal for Engineering research. Art mesmerizes me and reading fiction is my hobby.

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