Nine Tell-Tale Signs of an emotionally abusive partner
Emotional abuse by definition is so confusing by itself, let alone its symptoms and recognition. Have a look at the scientific One definition of emotional abuse yourself: “any act including confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation, infantilization, or any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity, and self-worth.”
The point is that with managing such a relationship with an oversensitive and controlling partner can be so intimidating even if it is hypothetical.
How does the partner explain or coerce his or her spouse about this condition without them being emotionally blackmailed and made guilty in the first place?
Emotional abuse is definitely insidious. It manifests itself in many forms and can be difficult to speak about and recognise for sure.
Those charming smiles and deeply romantic words, combined with extreme manipulation and unchecked jealousy can make their partners vulnerable in love and rueful.
Here are ten signs which can help you understand that you are definitely stuck with an emotionally abusive partner.
•They make you feel you they love you the most
The saddest part of being unable to raise alarm or even being aware of this form of abuse is that you are made to feel so special and cherished,you are not even aware of its existence.
You get sucked so badly into that emotional cycle that you rest and place your delicate heart in your partner’s hands.Even the slightest prick or argument can throw caution in the winds and make you go ,Oh no!
•They have you convinced that they are the best for you
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They are your lover, admirer and your life now depends on them.They almost always hover around you and have it themselves imprinted in your heart,mind and soul.No escape now.
•Displaying hypocrite behaviour is normal for them
They almost always display hypocrite behaviour by expecting you to submit and fulfil their expectations but when it comes to their turn , you never know the outcome.Hypocrisy exists in all forms,situations of your relationship – be it daily chores,child care, social expectations or even career decisions.
•Sweet in public, sour at home
They are overly sweet,affectionate and caring in public situations but when at home, they are a human version of Mr.Hyde!
•You are targeted financially if you try to escape
If the stage of dependency on your abusive partner is to an extreme extent where they control and monitor your bank account, transfers,funds and profits then this is a very bad state of your relationship. Emotional blackmailing for achieving monetary control to indirectly affect your emotions is their strategy.Even if you are financially independent , you are capable of doubting your intentions for even the smallest independent financial decision.
•Not criticizing is a missed opportunity
Criticizing the way you dress up, choice of clothes, personal prefernces, choice of friends seems their way of expressing their love for you. It is in the form of over-possessive comments and not insults or nasty comments.
It may sound something like,”I do not want my wife to look too attractive in front of other men” or “I do not want you to attract too much unwanted attention with a sexy dress like that”.
Sounds normal and not sarcastic like,”Why are you dressing this way in public places?” or “Do you want to attract all the men at the party?”.
There is a difference but the problem is that it slowly becomes second nature to control you through emotions and that undying love and concern they have for you.You are an independent individual who has he full right to dress as you please without being always judged or commented on, even by your partner for that matter!
•Insulting,cursing,repenting, and repeat!
This is an extreme level of emotional abuse where the abusive partner resents any missing attention and power in the relationship and resorts to verbal abuse. Insulting and cursing when angry and begging for forgiveness the next moment seems normal to them. The greatest part is that this cycle seems to never end and goes into repeat mode often.
•Your phone is filled with their bulk messages
Making your phone vibrate with frantic messages and calls all throughout the day is a sure-shot sign of an emotionally weak partner.They may feel insecure if you go away from them without prior permission or discussion and hence resort to tracking your location like crazy till you fall back into their open arms!
•Personal space and privacy is a dream
Respecting boundaries is the best form of communication and respect in a relationship. If you are craving for personal space since a long time, it is time to sit up and evaluate.
•You often doubt your sanity and intuition nowadays
The main tactic used by your abusive partner is convincing you enough to doubt your decision -making capability and make you regret for not trusting them blindly. Constantly dealing with such episodes makes you feel downright crazy and undermines your intuition. You start slowly wronging yourself and slapping yourself for having misunderstood them. This is a perfect example that your partner has got his or her buttons on your emotional pressure points for sure!
About the Author
Hi, I am Adeeba.I’m a freelance writer and a full time mom who likes writing intriguing stories and poems. I love leading my readers on an escape from everyday life. Nature is my inspiration and I firmly believe that self confidence is a key to success. My educational background includes an MTech in Computer Science and Engineering. I have a B.E. in Computer Science from M.J. College in Hyderabad, India. I have a research article on machine learning to my credit on IJEIR journal for Engineering research. Art mesmerizes me and reading fiction is my hobby.