Toxic Marriage- The Destroyer of Happy Homes

Cancer? The very word gets your guts go berserk at the sheer thought of it, right? When a tissue turns malignant, what happens? Everywhere we look around us, we see people living together because “Humans are a social animal”. Malignant, caustic, venomous may be only understatements when it comes to relationship turning sour.

Relationship on its own is incomplete unless the two are involved in it. Just couple coexisting isn’t enough. We need a special someone who will be there with us throughout and with whom we not only share a room but our entire life with and make our house home. So what happens when the two human beings cannot stay together and one’s actions harm the other? Well, it leads to a lot of bitterness breeding within the relationship. It turns the marriage toxic!

What is a toxic marriage? When the actions of one become the suffering of others, it becomes a toxic marriage. The other has to bear the brunt coz one of the couples isn’t into things heartedly.  Surely cant generalize, however normally largely it may be noticed how a husband seems casual about the marriage and mostly leads a bachelor’s life. So the two goes for a toss, there is NO two anymore! This in turns puts the complete responsibility of handling of the house on the wife, which leads to a stressful life which turns home into a battleground of poisonous attacks. It is also seen partners continue nonstop nagging continuously and rip the other of any freedom. Eventually, the home breaks! Now! who is to be held responsible as a home breaker? Simple things like pursuing one’s interest become a big deal and they cannot do it and mechanically carrying on the chores, looking after family unstoppable mood swings-depression due to the lack of interest from the partner and complete negligence. There, marriage becomes the most distasteful dish to digest. Who is the victim? The simplest answer to this is primarily both, husband and wife, become the main victim of it. The other members, while they are spectators also become the bear the brunt of this toxicity.

Initially, everything seems to be rosy. It feels there is an absence of whole two, it is just about one giving and the other simply taking all but not caring about giving at all. Seems one partner is completely in love. Turns out the other self-centered, very careless, belittling, disrespectful or a sheer attention seeker. Thinking of thing in retrospect one of the two have to go through this realizes the huge mistake made getting into this relationship in the first place. But shame! it’s a bit too late in most of the cases. The dominating partner normally gets habitual to their ways of living, doesn’t like to budge come what may and completely refuses to see how they butchered the other person’s life brutally. Of course, the marriage becomes an endurance and living together a punishment. Days of arguments stretch into weeks and lengthy cold wars of no cordial exchange of words reducing to times of no communication between the two.

The fear of losing a lifelong relationship and the hope of everything falling in place makes it difficult for them to separate. Hence, putting up with each other is the ONLY option out.

This toxic relation takes a toll on the spouse.

  • Somewhere they have lost their self-esteem, their confidence.
  • They are more confused day after day about what they are doing.
  • It takes a hard toll on their mental and physical well being- all it becomes is visits to psychiatrist or total ascetic life.
  • Postulations, overthinking and constant worrying eventually leads to depression and things become even worse.
  • The ratio of happy times to unhappy times becomes irrelevant at this point.

Good or for bad reason the empty life leaves not much option. you have lost the will to live, fight, try or just do anything. Coz you gave it all and it still failed. Towards the end only one option remains, to walk out of this relationship. A relationship which was supposed to be lifelong, where promises were made to be together, but the same relationship now starts to fall apart and fades into thin air.

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Alma Syed

About the Author

Alma Syed

A passionate reader and a budding writer. Working in retail with a degree in Telecommunication and Management.

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