Marriage- Fancy but not fancy

Marriage isn’t two fancy dolls getting hitched. It is much bigger. A concept that comes embedded with complications, responsibilities, ego, self-respect and much more. The harsh truth is that most of these attributes are in the male counterpart and the female is expected to be just like water, adjustable everywhere. But is it worthwhile to let go off your self-respect every time just to make the other one happy? Thousands of such questions evolve around. Not that there is no answer but those are not satisfying.

For instance, if you sit with the third generation, your grandma’s, they have a very different concept about marriage. For them the husbands are the one and all. You are not supposed to argue, talk loud or disobey. You shouldn’t step out of the house more often.  You are supposed to be carrying a Ghungat in front of elders and much more. It would rather sound, you are not up for marriage but bonded slavery. Fearful and would evoke emotions of rage in you, isn’t it?

Now, if you sit with the second generation, which is your mom’s, you would come to know a different view point. These days, women can participate in the decisions, can talk about the pros and cons of something, at times arguing is also acceptable. But then, still the male has the upper hand in the family. The wife needs his permission almost in every second household to do something. You cannot do something of your own. You need to fulfil all the demands and yet appreciation, which is a necessity, would come in scanty amounts. The condition in some houses are far more deteriorating. Scary, and may be, after this, one might not actually think of getting married.

Finally comes our generation, the carefree, and the freedom lovers. We have a different meaning for marriage. It is where you enjoy equal rights, you are equally respected as your spouse, where you share your responsibilities, where decisions are not imposed on you, where you need not be a house wife unless you choose to be, where you can enjoy your life on your own terms and conditions. In this generation, even live in relationship is acceptable, which otherwise, is against the values for most. You cannot force this generation for marriage or cannot just impose your decision on them.

Summing this up, with each passing generation, values and principles change, and so does the meaning. It depends on how you want to embrace the meaning of something. Marrying or not marrying is your choice, it is your life, and you have the right to think and decide before accepting and giving in to a relation.

“Marriage culminates into responsibilities, sharing and caring. Take your time before you enter the ring, because, unlike cricket, scoring a duck in this match is not acceptable.”

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Arpita Mukherjee

About the Author

Arpita Mukherjee

Immersed in the love of writing, I am a B.tech graduate from Assam. My name is Arpita Mukherjee. Emotions in me have a different way of flowing free, not by sound but by strokes. This is where I let me float. Come be a part of my world and feel the emotions. “If it is writing, I place my soul on a platter for you”- Arpita

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